Is Hillary Clinton going to run for president? We earnestly believe that she will, and she purposely left her job as secretary of state to do a couple things on the road to victory. First, she’ll take on a little bit of plastic surgery. Now, we want to be clear here: This neither is a criticism, nor should that comment be misconstrued as sexist. We simply believe that running for office has become, and forevermore will be, all about image.
Substance has been kicked to the curb, which easily is evidenced by the reelection of President Barack Obama. It just makes good business sense to ready your candidate, in this case Clinton, for office in the Image-IS-Everything Age. She’ll then splash onto the scene, perhaps with a new book, but that’ll happen only after she gets the stain of Benghazi off her hands, so a trip to a dermatologist might be in order.
Next, she’ll work the media – granted, an easy task – knowing full well it will genuflect, as always, to her, while remarking on how wonderful she looks and offering other insipidities. Then, shortly thereafter, she’ll announce her intent to pursue the presidency. She’ll inherit Obama’s fundraising apparatus and ground game, compliments of the deal brokered by her husband, former President Bill Clinton, in exchange for having thrown his support behind Obama’s reelection campaign. It should be terrific theatre, and you might wish to bet on Hillary winning, since we always can count on one thing: The Republicans will nominate their loser du jour, as they most always do, and proceed to run a campaign that could be bested by the average kid running for class president at a local high school.
So, then, let us flash forward to Nov. 8, 2016: “Ladies and gentlemen, the 45th president of the United States of America, Mrs. Hillary Rodham Clinton.” Again, a third party, please?