Opinion: Gorging on social media buffet

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I have a friend (let’s call him Joe, which, by the way, is his real name) who posts everything he eats on Facebook, or what could be called Feed Your Face Book.

Joe photographs daytime snacks, late-night raids of the fridge, even the doughnuts he hid under the front seat of his car. He has uploaded 3,000 food pictures onto his Mac—including a few dozen Big Macs, I might add. He wants to create a new app called Snack Chat. It’s like Snapchat: the picture of the food disappears in a few seconds, as quickly as Joe’s lunch.

Unlike Joe, I’ve been uploading meals and then downloading them onto my shirts for more than 60 years. It’s not uncommon for people to ask me about certain food choices I have posted on my clothing for all my friends to see…

“Looks delicious, Dick. Wasn’t that the special at Olive Garden last week?”

 “Been to a ball game, Dick? I recognize the mustard.”

Sharing your food intake encourages cheating, just like online dating. People sometimes fudge their age. And talking about fudge, what’s to stop a woman from taking the Hershey bar she ate for lunch and Photoshopping it into a little plastic bag filled with baby carrots? Men can be just as deceiving. Sure, it looks like a $45 ribeye from St. Elmo, but it’s really just a cheap piece of beef off the grill at Golden Corral. With guys, it pays to be wary of digital enhancements.

I eat a lot of meals in the car, so this would also create a bit of an inconvenience for me and jeopardize my already questionable driving record.

“Did I do something wrong, officer?”

“You suddenly pulled off onto the I-70 shoulder.”

“Sorry, I was just taking a photo of my fish sandwich.”

“Sir, this time I’m only going to issue a warning: Those are really high in sodium.”

I don’t think posting meal photos on Facebook will catch on here in Indiana. Hoosiers are good people with high moral standards. They don’t want their kids looking at corn all day on the internet.

 

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