Ode to Akard’s


By Donna Monday


The story goes
That in ’55
(Many of us were not yet alive.)
Jacob Julian Akard,
A noble man,
Decided one day
He had a plan.

He’d do what he
Hadn’t done before.
He’d open a Village
Hardware store.

Though no longer located
At Pine and Main,
Some things, thank God,
Have stayed the same.

It’s always been true,
If you need a nut, a bolt,
A tube of glue,
Akard’s is the place for you.

The house needs paint,
Inside and out?
Hey, just give Akard’s
A friendly shout.

They’ve got it all,
Always have.
They sell the good
And fix the bad.

No matter what
Your need may be,
Akard’s is
The place to be

Need a shovel?
Need a rake?
Need a brand new
Plumbers’ snake?

A Christmas tree?
A patio set?
A Bar-B-Q grill?
A charcoal briquette?

And service?

I’ll tell you a story
That’s really so.
It happened just
A few years ago.

One day I bought
Some paint off the shelf,
And Marsha Akard
Painted my room herself.

If you think I’m kidding,
You just ask her.
We knew if I did it,
It would be a disaster.

So go see Steve,
See Marsha,
Or Leigh Ann.
If they can’t help you,
Then Nobody can.

It’s been my creed,
And I try to heed it,
If Akardain’t got it,
You don’t need it.

So let’s celebrate
What was never before.
Our Village Hardware
Has an automatic door.