Opinion: An unhealthy airport exercise


Friends, I’ve always considered myself a “fit” person. I work out regularly and take geriatric vitamins. But my recent experience with Delta Airlines suggests that I’m not in as good a shape as I thought. Here’s the skinny.

My 6 a.m. flight from Mobile, Ala., to Atlanta was delayed 25 minutes because of, per the pilot, “a series of unfortunate events.” This was problematic because I had a tight layover, but I didn’t sweat it. The ATL-IND route runs every two hours. If I missed my original, I’d just catch a later one.

But Delta had no faith in me and automatically bumped me to another flight – the following morning. Umm, no. Unacceptable. There was still time! I’d have to navigate a crowded jetway, 30 B gates, several escalators, a stupid train and the majority of Terminal A, but it could be done. So, off I raced, sprinting and speed-walking, trying not to pee my pants, dragging a carry-on and large purse. I arrived as the last person was being checked in under the final boarding call — unable to breathe, let alone talk, and with a now-defunct boarding pass. Bless the attendant who quickly assessed my situation and got me on the plane.

As I collapsed in my seat, though, I was a hot mess. I could not slow my heart rate, and my blood pressure was through the roof. What was happening? I should be able to hurry through an airport without suffering a cardiac episode, but apparently not. “Ma’am? You’re in the wrong seat.” Oh, lord.

Despite exercise and old people supplements, friends, I’m not in as good a shape as I thought!

Peace out.